Wherein Margaret Goes to the Circus

I went to the circus yesterday. I was invited by my friend, Leslie. Normally I wouldn't go to the circus. The reason for this is very simple, my home is a circus--and not in the Family Circus kind of way.

I only say that because the characters in Family Circus don't use such colorful language as us. And by "us" I mean my husband. I never use colorful language. Because everyone that knows me knows that I'm perfect. See how the people in the Family Circus picture are smiling and hugging. The circus at my house looks more like this:

But I digress. The real circus, as in The St. Louis Moolah Shrine Circus, was almost as loud as my family circus and much more fun.

We arrived an hour early so the boys could participate in the festivities. I should note that Ephraim's friend is only three and is also an only child. This was our first outing so they were learning how to play together. Please note Ephraim has two big brothers who are 13 and 18 and his idea of play is slightly different than his new friend. See picture of Three Stooges above. Anywho, this is them riding the train. They were adorable! They looked so happy as they wound around the track.

And then they didn't. One minute they were smiling and laughing. The next minute they were trying to see who could pull the steering wheel out of the train while screaming as if their hair was on fire. The conductor quickly brought the train to a stop and gave us a look that said, "I've had my share of ornery kids but yours take the cake!" But Leslie and I just smiled and nodded because Ephraim's friend was running. Did I mention he likes to run and that he's faster than Road Runner? Beep! Beep!

Leslie insisted our next activity would be riding the elephants. I was very excited for the boys to ride the elephants but stated it was not my activity of choice. Therefore I would stand close by and smile like a good mommy and take pictures. The only problem with this was that they required the parent ride with the child and my child really wanted to ride the elephant. I let Leslie go first but for some reason her child was terrified of the elephant--I can't imagine why--and she and Ephraim's friend had to climb back down the ladder. Since my child had already been placed on top of the poor beast I felt that I had no other choice but to climb aboard. Oh the humanity. At least that's what the elephant said when I sat down.

Since some of the readers of this blog may have never had the pleasure of attending the circus, I would like to speak to circus ambiance. I suppose I could elaborate about the bright lights and the trapeze and the large crowds of smiling people, but I'll save that for another day. I would like to say that I had never been to the circus before and these were my big takeaways. They put big cats in little cages and when they let them out into the arena they slap them with whips and poke them with(what appeared to be) big sticks. I would have been worried about the trainers but they looked meaner than the cats. Also, there were people walking and bouncing and riding a bike around on a tight wire. I think everyone enjoyed this but it made me incredibly nervous. They did a number of "amazing" feats on that high-wire but I didn't enjoy it at all because I was fairly certain one of them was going to fall and turn into a big pile of goo. I don't like human goo. The other thing about the circus is that it is very loud.

I don't know what kind of speakers they equip that outfit with but they must be very expensive. Amazing how we could still hear our children screaming above the clamor and commotion. But while all of that is well and good, the most important thing about the circus is the cotton candy. I know this because as soon as we walked in that's the first thing my child noticed. And regardless of all the other activities we did, procuring cotton candy was the most important. I know this because he kept screaming, "I want cotton candy!" until I thought his lungs would burst. I tried to tell him that cotton candy is nothing but sugar and that sugar is bad for the body but he wasn't having it. It was cotton candy or ruptured ear drums. I wonder if this is why I craved cotton candy so badly when I was pregnant. Regardless, we bonded over cotton candy. And if there wasn't a picture to prove it, I would emphatically deny this happened.

But the best and most wonderfullest part of the circus was this:

Leslie is just about one of my favorite people and we had so much fun.

In short, I would highly recommend The St. Louis Moolah Shrine circus. Just watch out for the circus workers. And the camels. And the people on the high wire, lest you find yourself participating in the circus as you end up on the bottom of a pile of human goo.